1. They said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
2. Worst wingman. You don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompetent shyness
3. I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need.
4. Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
5. We're gonna ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited attraction town and that's where I'm gonna live my life and then die.
6. I keep rebuilding my brain’s forcefield against your charm and I feel like you seal team 6 your way in again and catch my common sense sleeping on post
7. It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
8. I got a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
[Before he met Norman, Matt never expected to befriend an FBI agent. The few times he's crossed paths with one before, they were distant and straight to business. Norman is far different, and infinitely more likable.
That they didn't meet while working on a case together probably helps.
He turns his head in the direction of the door, and the sound of Norman's voice, with a welcoming smile. Then he's back to securing the bottle of whiskey. He carries it back over to his desk, then returns to the kitchen area for two glasses.]
No problem. You're always welcome here.
[Even if the place could use a bit of tidying and isn't as roomy and quiet as his own apartment. Matt doesn't usually take people to his place as a first option, but he's considered the possibility with Norman. It's not so easy to tell exactly what he wants... and Matt isn't ready to make assumptions regarding a friend who doesn't spend too much time in the city.
Their time together is already limited. No need to scare him away.]
How long are you here for this time? In the city, I mean.
[It's a great office, in Norman's humble opinion. Police precincts are always overcrowded and noisy, full of people who give your shoulder a hard bump if you pass too close, and FBI HQs tend to be so sprawling that there's no impression of a single location at all. This is wonderfully cozy and seems like a place where someone could actually concentrate, not burn up most of their focus with the effort of blocking everyone else out.
Matt's smile is also great. Norman felt like there was potential for trouble between them the first time Matt ever flashed him that grin, and it still gives him the same little frisson of attraction it did then, but he hasn't got anything like the confidence necessary to find out if he's right. It's a quality about him that often leaves people wondering if their advances would even be welcome and leaves him in near-perpetual solitude.
Norman takes the liberty of opening the bottle and pouring for the two of them when Matt brings the glasses, then pulls up a nearby chair and sits down with his own drink.]
About... two, three weeks? Give or take. I got tapped as an expert witness for a case that goes back fuckin' decades, so I'm gonna be up to my eyeballs in files. Actual cardboard boxes full of files. [Said with an audible curled lip of distaste. ARI will be of little assistance this time.] Could be even longer. And -
[Outside, an approaching cacophony of honking horns makes Norman sigh in irritation.]
- well. Good thing I got out before the game ended.
[Oh shit. Are they back on this? Norman was sort of hoping he'd hit the end of Eddie's insane surprises with the alien.]
I haven't looked, but... I could scan your face to look for matchin' mug shots, or do a DNA or fingerprint match if it's in the system. It'd bring up your arrest record, any criminal charges laid against you.
Somethin' you wanna tell me before I find it out by accident?
But, uh, I mean, I should, right? That's the right thing to do? ( why does everything sound like a question with eddie? because he's really, really unsure about this whole 'dating an fbi agent' thing. it might be justified. it might not be. no far, norman doesn't seem like the type to turn a guy in just for accidentally harboring an alien. but norman also seems really dedicated to doing the right thing. which eddie likes, really.
eating people, however, doesn't seem like the right thing. )
You'll find some things, yeah. But there's worse things than dating a D-list criminal.
[And Norman takes his own deep breath. He's the one who wanted the plain truth out of Eddie's mouth; a bad reaction now will only ensure that he never speaks so plainly again.
( charges haven't really stuck, but it's only a matter of time before their life catches up to them. better to stay ahead of it, keep running, lie low at a beach and watch spanish soap operas in a dingy motel until they can think of something better. )
Murder, Norman.
...We killed a bad person. Probably the worst person alive.
( and some other people... but they're not important. )
[Norman closes his eyes and keeps them closed for a long while.
Murder. Quite obviously one of the serious crimes Norman said he needed to know about. He wants to be furious, to storm out on Eddie and declare him a dangerous liar that had to be left in Norman's rearview for his own safety - wouldn't that make a wonderful shield against the emotional devastation that's already threatening to burst free from his carefully maintained control? Wouldn't it be amazing if he could sit in the courtroom and watch Eddie be carted away with nothing but cold satisfaction that the bastard got what he deserved?
But that's not Norman, and he knows it. And he has a very profound feeling that the lying, manipulative bastard he casts as Eddie in that fantasy isn't actually Eddie, either. More likely from what he's seen so far is that Eddie dug this hole moment by moment, not with any premeditated plans, out of a desperate desire to dodge the inevitable for just one more moment.
That makes everything so much goddamned harder.]
Tell me what happened. [He opens his eyes again, suddenly appearing much more exhausted than he did before they closed.]
( the moment between when norman closes his eyes and when he opens them again stretches on into infinity. there's a lot of fidgeting on eddie's part, the itching urge to leave, the noisy (but manageable) urge to simply eat normAN, CRUNCH HIS BONES, WEAR HIS SILLY GLASSES LIKE A PRIZE, BE DONE WITH THIS BULLSHIT. but they can't just eat all of their problems; it's how they got themselves into this.
technically, it's how venom got them into this, but eddie's been growing worse and worse about distinguishing the divide, the part where eddie ends and venom begins. it's just them. a unit. maybe eddie has always been with venom. it's getting harder to remember a time when he wasn't. )
...Cletus Kasady is a serial killer. Or was. Maybe you've heard of him. He's killed somewhere between the dozens and the hundreds... Couldn't explain his M.O. He just kills people. ( there's more to it than that, and eddie was already dragged once for oversimplifying things, but the details don't seem terribly important in this moment. )
I interviewed him. He got ahold of my alien during the interview. Accidentally. He created his own, stronger alien. Named him Carnage. Or maybe he named himself, I don't know how that works. But they went on a rampage to destroy the city together, with Cletus' super-sonic-screeching girlfriend. They killed... lots of people... So we stopped them.
...There was a church, and a wedding. And this giant, ringing bell... doesn't matter how it happened. He's gone. So is his girlfriend.
[This is why Norman needed to take that time and calm himself before speaking. The story Eddie tells... it walks just enough moral lines to keep Norman from condemning Eddie outright for his actions, and some small details even help him reach a level of understanding.
Empathy, even.]
So once he had his own alien... am I right to assume that law enforcement couldn't have done much to take 'em down?
[That's it. That's the lynchpin of the entire argument. And Norman absolutely can't say for sure that it would hold up in a court of law.
What a horrible, helpless feeling. Norman's stomach feels like it's dropped through the floor beneath him and started tunneling underground. It must feel ten times worse for Eddie.
Very suddenly, Norman scrubs his hands roughly over his face to bring himself back to the present moment and lets out a harsh breath.]
Eddie... you two are worse than fucked when you get caught. There's no point arguin' about whether you deserve it or not. All that nuance probably won't mean shit.
We saved the world from a homicidal maniac, man. Cletus, he'd... he'd pull up a seat and watch the world burn if he could. He's that kind of person. Roast marshmallows on your burning body before he'd piss on you to put you out. The guy threw his own grandmother down the stairs, tossed a goddamn blow drier in the tub while his mom was bathing to watch her fry--
We did the right thing, is what I'm saying. What, were we supposed to sit by and let him turn the city into his playground? Let more people get hurt?
[Norman bears up through Eddie's furious rant, suspicious that Eddie didn't hear his last comment correctly or just couldn't process it yet... and sure enough.
When Eddie catches up, Norman gives him a weak nod. Somehow he looks even more exhausted now, and even a bit sick.]
When you're the one - the only one who knows the stakes and that there's no time to explain to anybody else - [He sighs.] You ended up with all the responsibility on your shoulders and none of the clearance to protect yourself from what comes after. That's the only reason doin' the right thing was a crime.
( clearly, eddie had expected this conversation to go very differently, like eddie would need to defend himself as if norman was his jury, judge, and executioner. the thought of losing him over this sort of feels that way. )
Wasn't any time for that, yeah... Exactly. Even if you did explain it, it'd be more of a waste of time, trying to convince people to do things by the books. We didn't have time for that, right. We had to do something. ( there was anne, and she loved the books. but her legal expertise has to stop somewhere before alien indictment. ) Gotta do what you gotta do, y'know?
[Norman's not good. This all hits very close to home, and that might be the main thing that keeps him from judging Eddie too harshly. He nods, a silent and blatant lie, but doesn't leave his response at that.]
I told you how Scott Shelby died, right? [He remembers the conversation well enough that he doesn't bother waiting for an answer. Eddie's impression of him as a superhero largely came from the story of throwing Scott Shelby into an industrial waste grinder.] We were fighting, he fell into the trash. Except he got hold of the platform we were on and shouted for help, over and over, and I -
- I watched him hang there for what felt like hours. I knew Blake was there thanks to all the lights flashin' through the rain and I knew he was there to pick up Ethan Mars, who I helped escape from the precinct 'cause I could just smell the set-up. Shelby was their man and they were gonna let him skate by stickin' Ethan's head on the block in his place. And that motherfucker, even when Ethan passed all his tests and won father of the fuckin' year or whatever, y'know what I walked in to see?
[Norman's voice is strained now, his eyes glassy with potential tears he's still holding back.]
Ethan was tryin' to free his son and Shelby had a gun pointed at his back. He was still gonna kill both of 'em.
[So. That's the story. Norman essentially killed Shelby through inaction because he knew that justice could never be served. Maybe his stance makes a bit more sense now.]
( eddie probably shouldn't call a murder good, but. ) The Origami killer, Shelby, he's been at it for years, man. He killed kids. Kids. Drowned them in rain water, or whatever, to find a guy willing to do what it takes to save them. Not like I need to tell you that. If you're losing sleep over not helping a guy like that... you shouldn't be.
( right, there's due process, and there's the adage 'innocent until proven guilty,' but there's nothing innocent about a guy who murders kids, the same way there's nothing innocent about a guy-turned-alien-murder-machine hellbent on killing anything he comes into contact with.
plus, if the articles are accurate, plenty of fathers embarked on shelby's trials; ethan's just the only one who made it out alive. which means shelby's whole thing is flawed, but trying to logic it out with a serial killer feels pretty moot. )
Is Ethan... good? And the kid, Shaun? They're good, right?
I know all of that, I know... and I don't beat myself up or anything, but it's still...
[After he talks about it, he still sees Shelby's portly body turn to pulp in a split-second every time he closes his eyes.
Anyway. That's not the point.]
... yeah. They're good. Ethan remarried and Shaun's doin' as well as he can. But I told you this 'cause if I wasn't FBI, if I just worked all this shit out myself and helped Ethan out 'cause it was the right thing to do - you see what I'm gettin' at? Technically, by law, we're not in the same boat but in every other way I'm no different.
[Norman just needs Eddie to know that he's not standing on any sort of higher moral ground and holding Eddie's secret over his head. They're the same, and Norman will protect him because the justice system he's an active part of won't.]
So... what you're saying is I need to get hired by the FBI to cover my tracks and get legal immunity to fuck people up?
( venom, evidently, was getting tired of simply listening in and he emerges from eddie's shoulder. )
WE WILL NEED A SUIT, EDDIE. WE WILL TAKE ONE OF NORMAN'S SUITS. AND WE WILL WEAR IT! BETTER! WE WILL LOOK GOOD!
No, man, we can't take Norm's clothes. He needs 'em.
Plus they wouldn't fit.
I'm more, y'know... ( he flexes a muscle to finish the sentence, which has venom bobbing closer to norman, as if to size him up. )
YOU ARE RIGHT. HE IS... SCRAWNY. WEAK. LET US FIGHT HIM.
Anyway, thanks for being cool about the whole... thing.
You can still do your glasses thing if you want. But with the way it messes with your head, I'd rather just tell you the things you wanna know. Not worth the brain damage. ( v, meanwhile, looks like he might lick norman, which makes eddie frown. ) Quit it, bud.
[Venom's threats don't carry much weight with Norman anymore now that he's heard how often they get thrown around, so he's not worried about an actual fight (aka massacre) regardless of what Venom says. He just watches the exchange with growing amusement, then throws his arms around Eddie and winds up pulling both of them into a tight embrace.]
Fuck you, V, I look great in my suit. [Said through laughter laced with semi-hysterical relief. They seem to have gotten through Eddie's huge confession alright, and it's just sinking in now that it's a rather huge step in their relationship.]
( the fact that this confession went as well is did is still doing numbers on eddie’s head. it’s clearly for the better. the whole thing is way, way better than eddie could have imagined, but he’s still blinking in surprise when norman is on him. it passes quickly, and both eddie and v wrap around him him. v, being as pliable as he is, probably doesn’t feel too different from being wrapped up an a wad of really thick gum. and eddie is solid, which makes for a nice contrast. )
[Norman laughs and presses his face into Eddie's hair, suddenly so emotional that he feels the need to hide. He felt just as much apprehension coming into this - maybe even more, because he came in with no idea what he was about to hear - and now he just feels closer to Eddie than ever. The fact that Eddie (and Venom) killed someone doesn't even remain in his thoughts as a blip on the radar.]
Eddie - [No, not just him.] - and V - I dunno if you realize how fuckin' crazy I am about you.
I just confessed to bodying someone, and I'm getting cuddles out of it. So I might have some idea. ( he's joking. he gets it. as if the venom reveal wasn't enough, now eddie doesn't think there's anything he's hiding from norman, nothing that he doesn't feel like he can't tell him. and it's good, the best. his last relationship was ruined by mistrust, and he's not about to do it again.
he might be going overboard, telling norman too much too soon, but there's no real downside to being too honest, is there? it just means there's someone out here that he can rely on. and hug, and smooch, and fuck, and cuddle, and all of those very important things, but reliability is just really, really nice right now. )
Man, seriously, you've got no idea. I could kiss you right now. ( ... ) Why am I not kissing you right now?
( he leans up and kisses norman, right now. sorry, norman; no hiding for you. behind them, venom flickers his tongue in a sign that might be a mating call back on his home world, if eddie cared to do his research and keep a log of all of v's idiosyncrasies. which he does not. )
[Norman's a very, very difficult person to scare off with too much information too soon. His natural intensity level means that he dives into everything head-first and all the way, so it's much more likely that he'll be the one to scare off a more distant person - either that or maintain his own distance if he doesn't immediately click with someone, which leads to them drifting away.
But none of the above is relevant with Eddie. He adores Eddie, and Eddie seems just as taken with him, and that means he's already very near ride or die levels of devoted.
He's still smiling when Eddie kisses him, and lets out a murmur of pure indulgent happiness into his mouth before pulling away to point out something else Eddie might not have considered.]
I'm good with the kisses, but just so you know - you could also be fuckin' me right now.
( good to know, because eddie has so, so much to share. some of that includes deep dark secrets, sure, but there's plenty useless knowledge rattling around in his head to keep norman entertained and, like, not totally weirded out. though, to be fair, alien and murder take the top spots on eddie's list. at this point, he doesn't think he's hiding much else. the one time he ran a red light, maybe, but that was for a good cause. )
Fucking? Fucking is an option? Even with the whole...
I mean, you know this has to be a group activity now, right? With active participation? From all parties? V's not gonna, like, sit back and pretend that he doesn't exist now that you, uh, know he exists.
IT IS TRUE. WE WISH TO SEE YOU IN COMPROMISING POSTIONS.
( venom's getting a head start on that one, twining his gooey tendrils around norman's arms and raising them above his head. )
[Norman whips his head from one side to the other as Venom takes hold of his arms, tugging against his grip despite harboring no real hope that he's capable of breaking free. Panic presses in at all of his shallowest pulse points, temples and wrists and throat; sweat breaks out all over his body and bile rises in his throat; still, he refuses to scream or fight.
He loves them. Both of them. As volatile as Venom may seem to Norman, he's never done any sort of harm and even hid his presence early on to allow Norman and Eddie to become close. That means he must have some degree of self-control...
Jesus, talking reasonably with Venom would be so much easier if he just had pupils. Those vacant white eyes really don't give anything away.]
First, you're gonna have to go into some detail about what fuckin' entails for you, V. Don't be shy, I wanna know what I'd be in for.
[Connor's been over to Norman's place so many times recently - for so many different reasons and with their relationship at so many different stages, Norman's apartment has always been the scene of the action.
Not once, during a single one of those visits, would Norman have believed that his apartment would see this sort of action with Connor.
They start out seated together on the loveseat, leaned into each other's bodies and kissing with the same urgent, steadily building heat that led them to escape here in the first place. Norman's also got a hand resting experimentally on Connor's thigh this time, both to anchor himself and to see if Connor finds the touch different when it's in that area.
For his own part, just the fact that Connor suggested they come back here to try things beyond kissing was enough to get Norman slightly hard and he's well on the way to half-hard now.]
[ he'll be the last to admit what he was feeling when following Norman into his home again was nervousness. this is further than what he was expecting whenever he'd considered this relationship of theirs, mostly because he was certain not being properly equipped or just being an android in general would be enough to turn Norman away. and sure, there's still plenty of time for that to happen. but Connor tries to focus on now instead of worrying what could happen later.
that nervousness seems to linger as he's kissed again, but it ebbs away they get closer, and that heat from earlier returns. Connor's diagnostics take a bit of a backseat, focusing on where to touch and the feeling of Norman's mouth on his, the sounds the other man makes when Connor tugs on his hair or gets a little bold with his tongue.
maybe bolder still. with Norman's hand getting explorative (and making some particular discoveries of Connor's attire beneath the surface in the process,) Connor feels encouraged to take a few chances himself. he moves slow when he shifts up on the couch, just so Norman can shove him away if he needs to, but if he doesn't then Norman will find himself with an android in his lap. he's careful not to break their kiss, keeps his hands in Norman's hair. he doesn't need the programs he's already disabled to tell how aroused the other is, but it's not like he's being told to stop yet, either. ]
[Norman definitely feels the interesting ridges beneath the fabric of Connor's pants, but he has no time to let his imagination run wild before Connor shifts his weight in a way that makes it very clear where he's headed. The shock of that realization makes his eyes pop open for a split-second; he would probably gasp aloud if Connor gave him the chance, but their mouths never separate.
All Norman can do when Connor's weight drops onto his lap is moan into his mouth, shuddering deeply at the sudden press of Connor's body against his swelling erection. At some point he manages to force out a single word between kisses, his voice unusually husky:]
Connor...
[Then Connor's tongue is back in his mouth and he just plants both hands on Connor's ass to hold on for dear life. If Connor figures out any sort of rocking motion with his hips, Norman may just come right in his pants. This is light years away from anything he ever imagined would happen between them and he's aching inside his shorts.]
[ oh. he likes ... that. hearing his name said like that. that buzzy sound in the back of his throat again, he can surmise it's his voice modulator glitching out from ... perhaps a combination of new stimuli and being prompted to make noises he wasn't necessarliy programmed to make. but it seems to happen when Norman does something, like now, with hands on his backside and saying his name in that breathy, guttural tone of his. new. exciting. Connor likes it, wants more of it. he starts very slowly, very curiously rocking his hips forward, just once, maybe twice.
he leans back for a moment, letting Norman catch his breath, assessing the ... ah, situation. Connor himself is a fair bit blue-flushed, his usually kept and tidy appearance ruffled and messed from their activity. he reaches to tug his own tie loose from around his neck, tossing it aside, eyes never leaving Norman's. ]
[When Connor sits back, Norman lets his head drop against the back of the couch while he catches his breath, his eyes staring blankly up at the ceiling. His body and mind are both completely overwhelmed by what's happening and yet it's not enough, of course it's not - the whole thing has his head spinning.
The beautiful, almost unbearably sexy sight of Connor all mussed and eager above him doesn't help, and yet he can't tear his eyes away once they land on him. Tell me what you want me to do... there are so many possible answers but most of them would end things far too quickly, and Norman wants nothing more than for this to remain an exploration, not race through it.
He reaches out for Connor instead of answering in words: with trembling fingers, he undoes the buttons on Connor's shirt and pushes it aside, then sits up to drag his lips over Connor's collarbone and up one side of his neck.]
Y'know what I really want right now? [Words whispered against Connor's ear, lips brushing the shell.] I wanna find out if any of your... skin sensors are more sensitive than the others.
[ the focus shifting to him isn't entirely what Connor's expecting here. android programming doing what it's supposed to do, he assumes. follow orders, be subservient, traces of old code that deviancy can't quite fully erase. he watches Norman's nervous fingers work at his shirt buttons, and he almost thinks to take Norman's hand and move it away, tell him don't worry about me, let's focus on you. he's the one who ...
it's not to say that Connor doesn't get anything out of it, of course not. he just doesn't expect to. he knows his anatomy and programming. the specific way he feels, both to the touch and how he experiences it himself, aren't going to be the same way that humans do. but he can't possibly deny that his system is on its way to overheating, that there's the urge to press on and the desire for more that can't be anything Cyberlife coded into him. it has to be what Norman's doing to him.
ah-- there it is again. a little buzzing sound. Norman's closer to the source this time, somewhere lodged in Connor's throat, the little zap and vibration of a voice module that has no idea what sound it's supposed to be making when Connor is kissed like that. it's probably weird. might be weirding Norman out. there go the insecurities - he doesn't feel like a human, synthesized skin isn't the same, he's more solid and plastic, his thirium pump doesn't sound like a heartbeat, he doesn't smell human, he doesn't sweat, he doesn't breathe heavy or pant or gasp for air. does Norman like this at all?
Connor immediately dismisses every single annoying notification in his HUD in favour of sliding out of the rest of his shirt, the bottom of it still tucked in and held in place by his belt and other undergarments, but the rest of his torso is bared for exploration. he winds his fingers back into Norman's hair again, gently tugs on dark strands and scratches blunt nails against his scalp. ]
You can touch me anywhere you want to. [ seems like they'll get to discover where those extra-sensitive sensors are together. ]
[Turns out that Norman is just as curious about Connor's body as Connor is about sex in general, and Norman's body more specifically.
Certainly the texture of Connor's skin beneath his hands and lips is unusual - it's so dry and, as Norman has noted before, has no particular smell or taste. He doesn't think he'd be this turned on by any android form, and would have zero interest in the physical shell without a personality inside, but Connor is responsive enough to smooth over the difference before it can bother Norman at all. Even the buzzing has started to hit his ears like a moan or gasp because the timing is so particular, and he smiles against Connor's skin every time he hears it again.
With Connor's chest exposed to him, Norman keeps his touch light as he grazes his fingertips over the familiar topography of toned human muscle, occasional ridges of bone, nipples that get a firmer touch with the pads of his thumbs, and he thinks that no one could have recreated a beautiful body this perfectly without intending for it to be worshipped in exactly this way. He kisses between Connor's pectorals, mouth open and hot, as his hands slip lower to grip Connor's inner thighs right where they meet his torso.]
You're so fuckin' sexy. [Not "hot" or "gorgeous" because, as Connor has said before, his design really has nothing to do with him. "Sexy" is much more active and as nervous and uncertain as Connor may be, he's still set Norman absolutely aflame.]
[ how does one respond to that particular sort of praise? Connor can take compliments for everything else, his technical capabilities, his advanced android functionality, even his design though really he just considers himself the messenger for sending that praise along to his development team. but sexy is a new thing entirely. it's like Norman's lying to him either, Connor's had his mouth on him and analyzed every inch of him that he could, all obvious signs of human arousal. so he's doing something right. that's promising.
but all Connor manages to say out loud (admist a few more of those odd buzzing noises, might have something to do with the faint circle in the middle of his chest where Norman's focusing his attention on,) is a soft, slightly awkward: ] ... thank you.
[ that seems wrong. he should say something back. but he can't help thinking that any of his attempts at dirty talk or flattery in this context would just sound too ... simulated. he wants to be as natural as possible, even though that poses a greater risk of doing something weird or off-putting in the process.
actions seem to be easier than words, at least. that's working out well for him. Connor grasps Norman's hands, gently guiding them down his body to where his belt is holding what remains of his clothing in place. when he's confident Norman gets the hint, his hands are back up in the man's hair, almost holding his head in place as if cradling him against his chest, placing kiss after tender kiss against Norman's equally mussed hair. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tifflins
2. Worst wingman. You don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompetent shyness
3. I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need.
4. Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
5. We're gonna ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited attraction town and that's where I'm gonna live my life and then die.
6. I keep rebuilding my brain’s forcefield against your charm and I feel like you seal team 6 your way in again and catch my common sense sleeping on post
7. It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
8. I got a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Matt Murdock (jurisdevil)
no subject
That they didn't meet while working on a case together probably helps.
He turns his head in the direction of the door, and the sound of Norman's voice, with a welcoming smile. Then he's back to securing the bottle of whiskey. He carries it back over to his desk, then returns to the kitchen area for two glasses.]
No problem. You're always welcome here.
[Even if the place could use a bit of tidying and isn't as roomy and quiet as his own apartment. Matt doesn't usually take people to his place as a first option, but he's considered the possibility with Norman. It's not so easy to tell exactly what he wants... and Matt isn't ready to make assumptions regarding a friend who doesn't spend too much time in the city.
Their time together is already limited. No need to scare him away.]
How long are you here for this time? In the city, I mean.
no subject
Matt's smile is also great. Norman felt like there was potential for trouble between them the first time Matt ever flashed him that grin, and it still gives him the same little frisson of attraction it did then, but he hasn't got anything like the confidence necessary to find out if he's right. It's a quality about him that often leaves people wondering if their advances would even be welcome and leaves him in near-perpetual solitude.
Norman takes the liberty of opening the bottle and pouring for the two of them when Matt brings the glasses, then pulls up a nearby chair and sits down with his own drink.]
About... two, three weeks? Give or take. I got tapped as an expert witness for a case that goes back fuckin' decades, so I'm gonna be up to my eyeballs in files. Actual cardboard boxes full of files. [Said with an audible curled lip of distaste. ARI will be of little assistance this time.] Could be even longer. And -
[Outside, an approaching cacophony of honking horns makes Norman sigh in irritation.]
- well. Good thing I got out before the game ended.
hello random starter
…
What do they say when you look at me?
GASP hello!!
I haven't looked, but... I could scan your face to look for matchin' mug shots, or do a DNA or fingerprint match if it's in the system. It'd bring up your arrest record, any criminal charges laid against you.
Somethin' you wanna tell me before I find it out by accident?
no subject
But, uh, I mean, I should, right? That's the right thing to do? ( why does everything sound like a question with eddie? because he's really, really unsure about this whole 'dating an fbi agent' thing. it might be justified. it might not be. no far, norman doesn't seem like the type to turn a guy in just for accidentally harboring an alien. but norman also seems really dedicated to doing the right thing. which eddie likes, really.
eating people, however, doesn't seem like the right thing. )
You'll find some things, yeah. But there's worse things than dating a D-list criminal.
no subject
[He pulls out the glasses, turns them around in his hands, fiddles with the arms... one last chance for Eddie to offer up the information himself.]
no subject
( deep breath, bud. you can do this. )
To start... we might be, uh... fugitives?
no subject
Deep breath. Stay calm.
Evenly, without any real expression:]
On what charges?
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Murder, Norman.
...We killed a bad person. Probably the worst person alive.
( and some other people... but they're not important. )
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Murder. Quite obviously one of the serious crimes Norman said he needed to know about. He wants to be furious, to storm out on Eddie and declare him a dangerous liar that had to be left in Norman's rearview for his own safety - wouldn't that make a wonderful shield against the emotional devastation that's already threatening to burst free from his carefully maintained control? Wouldn't it be amazing if he could sit in the courtroom and watch Eddie be carted away with nothing but cold satisfaction that the bastard got what he deserved?
But that's not Norman, and he knows it. And he has a very profound feeling that the lying, manipulative bastard he casts as Eddie in that fantasy isn't actually Eddie, either. More likely from what he's seen so far is that Eddie dug this hole moment by moment, not with any premeditated plans, out of a desperate desire to dodge the inevitable for just one more moment.
That makes everything so much goddamned harder.]
Tell me what happened. [He opens his eyes again, suddenly appearing much more exhausted than he did before they closed.]
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technically, it's how venom got them into this, but eddie's been growing worse and worse about distinguishing the divide, the part where eddie ends and venom begins. it's just them. a unit. maybe eddie has always been with venom. it's getting harder to remember a time when he wasn't. )
...Cletus Kasady is a serial killer. Or was. Maybe you've heard of him. He's killed somewhere between the dozens and the hundreds... Couldn't explain his M.O. He just kills people. ( there's more to it than that, and eddie was already dragged once for oversimplifying things, but the details don't seem terribly important in this moment. )
I interviewed him. He got ahold of my alien during the interview. Accidentally. He created his own, stronger alien. Named him Carnage. Or maybe he named himself, I don't know how that works. But they went on a rampage to destroy the city together, with Cletus' super-sonic-screeching girlfriend. They killed... lots of people... So we stopped them.
...There was a church, and a wedding. And this giant, ringing bell... doesn't matter how it happened. He's gone. So is his girlfriend.
And a cop...
We liked the cop.
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Empathy, even.]
So once he had his own alien... am I right to assume that law enforcement couldn't have done much to take 'em down?
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Think of that, and then think of Carnage as like triple-decker V.
Way bigger than us.
Way stronger.
He ate cops for breakfast. And not even in the metaphorical sense.
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What a horrible, helpless feeling. Norman's stomach feels like it's dropped through the floor beneath him and started tunneling underground. It must feel ten times worse for Eddie.
Very suddenly, Norman scrubs his hands roughly over his face to bring himself back to the present moment and lets out a harsh breath.]
Eddie... you two are worse than fucked when you get caught. There's no point arguin' about whether you deserve it or not. All that nuance probably won't mean shit.
And that's why I'm not gonna turn you in.
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We did the right thing, is what I'm saying. What, were we supposed to sit by and let him turn the city into his playground? Let more people get hurt?
( ... )
Wait, you said you're not turning us in?
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When Eddie catches up, Norman gives him a weak nod. Somehow he looks even more exhausted now, and even a bit sick.]
When you're the one - the only one who knows the stakes and that there's no time to explain to anybody else - [He sighs.] You ended up with all the responsibility on your shoulders and none of the clearance to protect yourself from what comes after. That's the only reason doin' the right thing was a crime.
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( clearly, eddie had expected this conversation to go very differently, like eddie would need to defend himself as if norman was his jury, judge, and executioner. the thought of losing him over this sort of feels that way. )
Wasn't any time for that, yeah... Exactly. Even if you did explain it, it'd be more of a waste of time, trying to convince people to do things by the books. We didn't have time for that, right. We had to do something. ( there was anne, and she loved the books. but her legal expertise has to stop somewhere before alien indictment. ) Gotta do what you gotta do, y'know?
You good?
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I told you how Scott Shelby died, right? [He remembers the conversation well enough that he doesn't bother waiting for an answer. Eddie's impression of him as a superhero largely came from the story of throwing Scott Shelby into an industrial waste grinder.] We were fighting, he fell into the trash. Except he got hold of the platform we were on and shouted for help, over and over, and I -
- I watched him hang there for what felt like hours. I knew Blake was there thanks to all the lights flashin' through the rain and I knew he was there to pick up Ethan Mars, who I helped escape from the precinct 'cause I could just smell the set-up. Shelby was their man and they were gonna let him skate by stickin' Ethan's head on the block in his place. And that motherfucker, even when Ethan passed all his tests and won father of the fuckin' year or whatever, y'know what I walked in to see?
[Norman's voice is strained now, his eyes glassy with potential tears he's still holding back.]
Ethan was tryin' to free his son and Shelby had a gun pointed at his back. He was still gonna kill both of 'em.
[So. That's the story. Norman essentially killed Shelby through inaction because he knew that justice could never be served. Maybe his stance makes a bit more sense now.]
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( eddie probably shouldn't call a murder good, but. ) The Origami killer, Shelby, he's been at it for years, man. He killed kids. Kids. Drowned them in rain water, or whatever, to find a guy willing to do what it takes to save them. Not like I need to tell you that. If you're losing sleep over not helping a guy like that... you shouldn't be.
( right, there's due process, and there's the adage 'innocent until proven guilty,' but there's nothing innocent about a guy who murders kids, the same way there's nothing innocent about a guy-turned-alien-murder-machine hellbent on killing anything he comes into contact with.
plus, if the articles are accurate, plenty of fathers embarked on shelby's trials; ethan's just the only one who made it out alive. which means shelby's whole thing is flawed, but trying to logic it out with a serial killer feels pretty moot. )
Is Ethan... good? And the kid, Shaun? They're good, right?
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[After he talks about it, he still sees Shelby's portly body turn to pulp in a split-second every time he closes his eyes.
Anyway. That's not the point.]
... yeah. They're good. Ethan remarried and Shaun's doin' as well as he can. But I told you this 'cause if I wasn't FBI, if I just worked all this shit out myself and helped Ethan out 'cause it was the right thing to do - you see what I'm gettin' at? Technically, by law, we're not in the same boat but in every other way I'm no different.
[Norman just needs Eddie to know that he's not standing on any sort of higher moral ground and holding Eddie's secret over his head. They're the same, and Norman will protect him because the justice system he's an active part of won't.]
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( venom, evidently, was getting tired of simply listening in and he emerges from eddie's shoulder. )
WE WILL NEED A SUIT, EDDIE.
WE WILL TAKE ONE OF NORMAN'S SUITS.
AND WE WILL WEAR IT! BETTER! WE WILL LOOK GOOD!
No, man, we can't take Norm's clothes. He needs 'em.
Plus they wouldn't fit.
I'm more, y'know... ( he flexes a muscle to finish the sentence, which has venom bobbing closer to norman, as if to size him up. )
YOU ARE RIGHT.
HE IS... SCRAWNY.
WEAK.
LET US FIGHT HIM.
Anyway, thanks for being cool about the whole... thing.
You can still do your glasses thing if you want. But with the way it messes with your head, I'd rather just tell you the things you wanna know. Not worth the brain damage. ( v, meanwhile, looks like he might lick norman, which makes eddie frown. ) Quit it, bud.
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Fuck you, V, I look great in my suit. [Said through laughter laced with semi-hysterical relief. They seem to have gotten through Eddie's huge confession alright, and it's just sinking in now that it's a rather huge step in their relationship.]
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( the fact that this confession went as well is did is still doing numbers on eddie’s head. it’s clearly for the better. the whole thing is way, way better than eddie could have imagined, but he’s still blinking in surprise when norman is on him. it passes quickly, and both eddie and v wrap around him him. v, being as pliable as he is, probably doesn’t feel too different from being wrapped up an a wad of really thick gum. and eddie is solid, which makes for a nice contrast. )
We like how you look, Norman. Don’t worry.
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Eddie - [No, not just him.] - and V - I dunno if you realize how fuckin' crazy I am about you.
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he might be going overboard, telling norman too much too soon, but there's no real downside to being too honest, is there? it just means there's someone out here that he can rely on. and hug, and smooch, and fuck, and cuddle, and all of those very important things, but reliability is just really, really nice right now. )
Man, seriously, you've got no idea. I could kiss you right now. ( ... ) Why am I not kissing you right now?
( he leans up and kisses norman, right now. sorry, norman; no hiding for you. behind them, venom flickers his tongue in a sign that might be a mating call back on his home world, if eddie cared to do his research and keep a log of all of v's idiosyncrasies. which he does not. )
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But none of the above is relevant with Eddie. He adores Eddie, and Eddie seems just as taken with him, and that means he's already very near ride or die levels of devoted.
He's still smiling when Eddie kisses him, and lets out a murmur of pure indulgent happiness into his mouth before pulling away to point out something else Eddie might not have considered.]
I'm good with the kisses, but just so you know - you could also be fuckin' me right now.
sorry for the delay; school is taking me out u.u
Fucking? Fucking is an option? Even with the whole...
I mean, you know this has to be a group activity now, right? With active participation? From all parties? V's not gonna, like, sit back and pretend that he doesn't exist now that you, uh, know he exists.
IT IS TRUE.
WE WISH TO SEE YOU IN COMPROMISING POSTIONS.
( venom's getting a head start on that one, twining his gooey tendrils around norman's arms and raising them above his head. )
LIKE THIS.
THIS DOES THINGS TO US.
pls take good care of yourself <3
He loves them. Both of them. As volatile as Venom may seem to Norman, he's never done any sort of harm and even hid his presence early on to allow Norman and Eddie to become close. That means he must have some degree of self-control...
Jesus, talking reasonably with Venom would be so much easier if he just had pupils. Those vacant white eyes really don't give anything away.]
First, you're gonna have to go into some detail about what fuckin' entails for you, V. Don't be shy, I wanna know what I'd be in for.
cw for (sort of) robotfucking
Not once, during a single one of those visits, would Norman have believed that his apartment would see this sort of action with Connor.
They start out seated together on the loveseat, leaned into each other's bodies and kissing with the same urgent, steadily building heat that led them to escape here in the first place. Norman's also got a hand resting experimentally on Connor's thigh this time, both to anchor himself and to see if Connor finds the touch different when it's in that area.
For his own part, just the fact that Connor suggested they come back here to try things beyond kissing was enough to get Norman slightly hard and he's well on the way to half-hard now.]
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that nervousness seems to linger as he's kissed again, but it ebbs away they get closer, and that heat from earlier returns. Connor's diagnostics take a bit of a backseat, focusing on where to touch and the feeling of Norman's mouth on his, the sounds the other man makes when Connor tugs on his hair or gets a little bold with his tongue.
maybe bolder still. with Norman's hand getting explorative (and making some particular discoveries of Connor's attire beneath the surface in the process,) Connor feels encouraged to take a few chances himself. he moves slow when he shifts up on the couch, just so Norman can shove him away if he needs to, but if he doesn't then Norman will find himself with an android in his lap. he's careful not to break their kiss, keeps his hands in Norman's hair. he doesn't need the programs he's already disabled to tell how aroused the other is, but it's not like he's being told to stop yet, either. ]
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All Norman can do when Connor's weight drops onto his lap is moan into his mouth, shuddering deeply at the sudden press of Connor's body against his swelling erection. At some point he manages to force out a single word between kisses, his voice unusually husky:]
Connor...
[Then Connor's tongue is back in his mouth and he just plants both hands on Connor's ass to hold on for dear life. If Connor figures out any sort of rocking motion with his hips, Norman may just come right in his pants. This is light years away from anything he ever imagined would happen between them and he's aching inside his shorts.]
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he leans back for a moment, letting Norman catch his breath, assessing the ... ah, situation. Connor himself is a fair bit blue-flushed, his usually kept and tidy appearance ruffled and messed from their activity. he reaches to tug his own tie loose from around his neck, tossing it aside, eyes never leaving Norman's. ]
Tell me what you want me to do.
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The beautiful, almost unbearably sexy sight of Connor all mussed and eager above him doesn't help, and yet he can't tear his eyes away once they land on him. Tell me what you want me to do... there are so many possible answers but most of them would end things far too quickly, and Norman wants nothing more than for this to remain an exploration, not race through it.
He reaches out for Connor instead of answering in words: with trembling fingers, he undoes the buttons on Connor's shirt and pushes it aside, then sits up to drag his lips over Connor's collarbone and up one side of his neck.]
Y'know what I really want right now? [Words whispered against Connor's ear, lips brushing the shell.] I wanna find out if any of your... skin sensors are more sensitive than the others.
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it's not to say that Connor doesn't get anything out of it, of course not. he just doesn't expect to. he knows his anatomy and programming. the specific way he feels, both to the touch and how he experiences it himself, aren't going to be the same way that humans do. but he can't possibly deny that his system is on its way to overheating, that there's the urge to press on and the desire for more that can't be anything Cyberlife coded into him. it has to be what Norman's doing to him.
ah-- there it is again. a little buzzing sound. Norman's closer to the source this time, somewhere lodged in Connor's throat, the little zap and vibration of a voice module that has no idea what sound it's supposed to be making when Connor is kissed like that. it's probably weird. might be weirding Norman out. there go the insecurities - he doesn't feel like a human, synthesized skin isn't the same, he's more solid and plastic, his thirium pump doesn't sound like a heartbeat, he doesn't smell human, he doesn't sweat, he doesn't breathe heavy or pant or gasp for air. does Norman like this at all?
Connor immediately dismisses every single annoying notification in his HUD in favour of sliding out of the rest of his shirt, the bottom of it still tucked in and held in place by his belt and other undergarments, but the rest of his torso is bared for exploration. he winds his fingers back into Norman's hair again, gently tugs on dark strands and scratches blunt nails against his scalp. ]
You can touch me anywhere you want to. [ seems like they'll get to discover where those extra-sensitive sensors are together. ]
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Certainly the texture of Connor's skin beneath his hands and lips is unusual - it's so dry and, as Norman has noted before, has no particular smell or taste. He doesn't think he'd be this turned on by any android form, and would have zero interest in the physical shell without a personality inside, but Connor is responsive enough to smooth over the difference before it can bother Norman at all. Even the buzzing has started to hit his ears like a moan or gasp because the timing is so particular, and he smiles against Connor's skin every time he hears it again.
With Connor's chest exposed to him, Norman keeps his touch light as he grazes his fingertips over the familiar topography of toned human muscle, occasional ridges of bone, nipples that get a firmer touch with the pads of his thumbs, and he thinks that no one could have recreated a beautiful body this perfectly without intending for it to be worshipped in exactly this way. He kisses between Connor's pectorals, mouth open and hot, as his hands slip lower to grip Connor's inner thighs right where they meet his torso.]
You're so fuckin' sexy. [Not "hot" or "gorgeous" because, as Connor has said before, his design really has nothing to do with him. "Sexy" is much more active and as nervous and uncertain as Connor may be, he's still set Norman absolutely aflame.]
hi it's still me just swapping to my psl account
but all Connor manages to say out loud (admist a few more of those odd buzzing noises, might have something to do with the faint circle in the middle of his chest where Norman's focusing his attention on,) is a soft, slightly awkward: ] ... thank you.
[ that seems wrong. he should say something back. but he can't help thinking that any of his attempts at dirty talk or flattery in this context would just sound too ... simulated. he wants to be as natural as possible, even though that poses a greater risk of doing something weird or off-putting in the process.
actions seem to be easier than words, at least. that's working out well for him. Connor grasps Norman's hands, gently guiding them down his body to where his belt is holding what remains of his clothing in place. when he's confident Norman gets the hint, his hands are back up in the man's hair, almost holding his head in place as if cradling him against his chest, placing kiss after tender kiss against Norman's equally mussed hair. ]